Gratitude

Good morning.  In a world where there is so much to be thankful for, I think we don't say our heartfelt thanks enough.  We've had a hard day/week/month, so when my sister mentioned to me she read something about saying a gratitude a day, I immediately began thinking.  I wonder if having everyone say at least one thing we are grateful for the other person for would help our situation.  We're specifically saying something positive or grateful about everyone in our home at the dinner table now.  We'll also include saying three of the best things from our day.

Honestly...

Here's the thing.  My kids, especially one of them, tends to act like a spoiled disrespectful brat.  And I'm trying to kick that attitude to the curb.  ASAP.  It has gotten so bad that there's been yelling, pushing, hurtful things have been said...all things that started with this lovely move.  My sweet and cuddly child is angry.  So angry.  And it's been stressful lately.  We should be having fun together.  Not bickering all day long.  We had a nice family talk last night and we all agreed to work together to get better to be happier.  The emotions of one person is so toxic that is sends everyone over the edge.

My little guy didn't want to clean his room on Sunday and told me I could take away all of his toys.  I told him that I would take all of his toys, but he still had to clean them up.  He hates responsibilities. Loathes them!  After he was done, I put every toy up and away.  All he said was...well, now it will be easy to cleanup because I don't have anything.  Ugh.

My little gal?  She adores playing with her brother and begs me to make him play with her.  I won't.  It's his choice.  She begs and pleads with him.  He usually caves in and plays, but, on his terms.  It doesn't usually end well, but they'll play for a couple hours nicely.

I hear a lot of...I'm never playing with him/her again, and I hate you, and you're the worst brother/sister ever, and but she/he said/did it, and I wish you weren't in our family.  Ouch.  I hate hearing these words come of their angry mouths.  

This morning as we were getting ready for camp, Sterling didn't want to go.  Xander asked her why and said that he'd miss her.  I reminded him that "you never want to play with her again though".  He declared that he didn't mean it.  He just said it because he was angry at her.  This is the problem.  They're not thinking before they speak.  That's what I want to fix.  I plead with them every day to only say what you'd want to be said to you, but it hasn't clicked yet.  Obviously.

So, with this gratitude/positive talk we're starting, I have a feeling it's only going to be for the better.  I'd already seen a difference.  Mornings are rough, but this morning was not.  Everyone was calm, talking politely, and helping each other get things done so we could get out the door on time.  It was a nice change and I'm hopeful that we can make it stick around.

I know a lot of people are talking gratitude because of Thanksgiving, but we're going to stick with this every day.  Saying enough positive things about one another can only lead to good things to come.  So, we're not stopping when Thanksgiving is over.

My problem...

I've got a lot of reading ahead of me.  One problem I have with some of the great books I have read is that in the heat of an attack, how do you remember the new technique you're supposed to use?  My brain is on fire, I can't think of which technique I should be using at that time.

What are some technique's you've found to help in your family?  I know I'm not the only one dealing with this ;)

Happy Thanksgiving, enjoy the break and tell someone something positive about them.  It'll make you feel better too.